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Heather Rai

All Are Welcome Here

Exploring Motherhood, Without Fences

As I build this website, I feel some discomfort that it could be seen as excluding people I would also like to welcome under the umbrella. It can feel like a delicate balance at times but I definitely don’t wish to put up fences and defend any territory. I want to be open to discussion and invite people in, rather than shut them out. If you are curious about what I have written, then you are welcome and included.

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Therapy room with two empty chairs

What is Person-Centred Therapy?

Person-Centred Therapy was developed by psychologist Carl Rogers in the 1950s. It is also known as the Person-Centred Approach, or PCA, because it can also be applied to many other areas of life, such as education, healthcare or parenting.

To give an idea of what you might expect if you choose a person-centred counsellor, I will describe some of the person-centred approach’s main parts below:

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Mother and child sat together at a table

Maternal Congruence

A common theme in my dissertation interviews was the struggle to find congruence as a mother. The women I spoke to talked about the challenges of caring deeply for their children whilst also keeping in touch with their own needs and the constant juggle this brought.

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Mum sat on sofa with four children

What is Authentic Mothering?

If living authentically is challenging, then living an authentic life once we become mothers can be even harder. If you are a mum, you have probably noticed how much pressure there is to act a particular way and to care for your child according to the advice of family, friends and the experts who write about parenting.

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Mother and child holding hands

Mothering and The Person-Centred Approach: A Beautiful Match

My introduction to the PCA was through motherhood. Before I trained as a person-centred therapist, I trained as a breastfeeding counsellor with the National Childbirth Trust and this training was very firmly rooted in person-centred theory. Tutorials took place in my tutor’s home, surrounded by her grandchildren’s toys and family photos. We talked about our own experiences of motherhood and we were introduced to the work of Carl Rogers as the best way to support the mothers we were preparing to meet.

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A black and white photograph of a chair in a therapy room

A Therapist Reflects

This is the creative piece written as the final stage of the heuristic research I undertook for my MA dissertation. The research examined the invisibility of mothering in the Person-Centred Approach. Heuristic research involves researching and immersing yourself in a subject and then consciously stepping back to see what spontaneously emerges. I was skeptical but

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